I lost my virginity to a married...

I lost my virginity to a married man at the age of 22. I didn't know he was married. After I found out, I tried getting away from the relationship but I wasn't strong enough. The relationship continued and still continues for almost 3 years. I love him. He tells me he loves me and I believe him...just not completely. He is in the process of getting a divorce- he wants to make sure to leave his wife and little boy financially stable which is slowing down the whole process. Even though he tells me we will be together, I don't know if I really believe him. At least I have been strong enough to stop the sexual part of the relationship. My family doesn't know that I am still seeing him. They think that we are apart since I found out he is married. I feel shame for lying to those close to me. I worry that God will not let this relationship flourish since it formed on the basis of a sin. I ask for forgiveness for my sin, but how can I be forgiven when I haven't stopped sinning? No matter what I still am sinning...I ask for strength and forgiveness. I feel like I am self-destructing.